GALACTICS IV DISPATCH 01: BANDITS + NEWBIES, TOURNEY DEETS, THAT GOD DAMN APPLICATION, PLUS HOOPS & CHAIN NUMERO 6 AND MORE.
The Mechanic •
Hola Jabringos,
Galactics IV — The Greatest Sporting Event on Mother F’en Earth — is shaping up to be a banger. We are in go-mode, heavily investing in field shaping, and YFS tournament innovation for you to dip yourself in come late April. We would like to pre-thank the ones who have helped spark it up with timely $500 deposits. This 4 night, 3 day winner-take-all go-round is lousy with fresh faces, and some Galactics gap returners. All in all, it’s a YFS dipshit gumbo simmering real, real nice.
We’ll kick the tires with a note to our beloved greenhorn Galactic’s entrants — the Banditos and the newbies. If you’ve never attended a G, these next few paragraphs have been specially prepared just for you.
FOR OUR BANDITOS + NEWBIES
Arrival: Your travel should have you getting into San Diego on Thursday, April 23. You’ll need to make your way to our meetup cantina, a 15 minutes motorized jaunt from the SD border by taxi, hang glider, or 3-wheeler by 5:00 PM. What time should you fly in? You do the math. The pilgrimage over the border is your unofficial consent.
Once you check in with Galactics brass, you’re in our hands. Our Galactics host Toro and his lovable ruffians, and myself will welcome you into the fold.
Departure: Do not book return flights out of San Diego earlier than 2:00 PM on Monday, April 27. Any earlier and you could be sweat-hoggin’ border delays.
WHAT TO BRING
Passport (unless you are Mexican)
Change of clothes for 3 playing days and nights — or bring one outfit and be a dirty stayout. You wouldn’t be the first.
Layers. It’s spring in Northern Baja. It can get cold at night if games push. It may rain. Be a Bro Scout.
Something kinda nice for the Sunday closing ceremony afterparty. We’ve seen all sorts of effort here – if pushed to describe it we’d go with ‘dipshit festive’ — just be you and all will be alright.
FOR THE PERSON WHO HAS SENT A $500 DEPOSIT BUT NO APPLICATION
This tournament has requirements. They were not invented for fun. If you are a returning Galactics player currently sitting in your underoos, app-less, watching YouTube and eating Golden Grahams — close the loop. Bust out a writing tool, some paper, source a $2 bill, and tell us why you should be considered to play in this Galactics. Returning players who have not completed an application will not be taking the field at G4. Even Jet City’s Daisy Cutter sent his in. The worst kid in class handled it.
FOR THE PERSON WHO HAS NOT SENT IN A $500 DEPOSIT BUT ROUTINELY TEXTS OR EMAILS YFS HQ “BRO…I THINK I’M IN BRO”
No deposit beyond Wednesday, March 13th makes it hard to hold the door for you. Plans need to be laid in a myriad of ways — from hotel room blocks to fish tacos and Tecates, Tecate Zeros to churros, cocos to seats on a bus — and without your commitment, we can’t size this glory harvest properly.
NEW HOOPS + CHAIN POD — EP. 6
We hit six! Who knew these two shitsticks could produce anything worth setting time aside for, let alone half a dozen mildly-decent podcasts. Hey, even Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton got lucky with that “Islands in the Stream” ditty.